Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Keep Out of Children

Warning this post may have an offensive word in it.

Years ago when my husband and I were shopping at a local Dollar store, we found this saying on the side of a box of knives made in China: Keep out of children.

Another time we entered a city municipal building and read a poorly abbreviated sign outside of the Tax Collectors office. It said, "Collector of Taxes and Asses". We both just about fell on the floor laughing.

Today, while checking my FreeCycle and Cheap Cycle discussion boards, I almost spit my juice all over the screen when I read this line: Women's clothing, Reduced 50%. First, size large and now small and medium. What? Did that mean they reduced the sizes of the women's clothing or the prices?


Hear are some more funnies:

1. "Please come and bring a guest to our "carry-in" game dinner. (I heard this on the radio and thought it said "carrion".)
2. "Join us this evening for a special treat at we hear missionary Bertha Belch all the way from Africa."
3. "Ears pierced while you wait. Half off on Wednesdays." (A sign outside a Jewelry boutique.)
4. Next Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come forward and get a piece of paper. (church bulletin.)
5. "I'm so glad you are good fried." (I wrote this on a note but meant to write "I'm so glad you are my good friend.)

I hope these examples serve as reminders to all writers to be careful in choosing and spelling your words...or NOT! Those of us with demented minds and sick senses of humor need more faux paus to tickle for our funny bones.

Monday, January 26, 2009

Writers Groups and Writing

Every month I join my friends and writing colleagues at Clermont Christian Writers Group. Today was an exception. With sick children and their symptoms sneaking up in my own body, I was prevented from attending.
Writers groups are a wonderful way to stay motivated and accountable for achieving one's writing goals. Over the years, I've been involved in many, from the simple, show-up-and-read forums to those containing workshops with writing prompts and critique groups. Whatever type of group I attend, I look forward to the camaraderie of those who enjoy looking at the world through unique perspectives and capturing it with words of poetry, prose or any other stream of consciousness that is expressed in writing. Currently, I am involved in some online writing communities as well. All of these venues are rewarding as they provide not only fellowship but valuable input from others who may have skill or perspective different from my own.
Although absent from this month's meeting, the plan is to keep abreast of writing opportunities via the web and communication with other members. As well, I will write frequent blog posts on this and my other blogs.
It is important as writers to keep our goals in sight, remembering that being connected to other writers is vital.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

FaithWriters/ Update

Check out this awesome website to which a friend and fellow writer referred me. It is called FAITHWRITERS. Full of great links, communities, critiques and writing challenges, it comes at an affordable price: Free. Other services are also available through the membership but they are offered at affordable rates.

Click here:
http://www.faithwriters.com/

I posted my first essay on their site and received a compliment from a well established member.

Last Week's writing challenge was the USA. This week's is Australia or New Zealand.

It will be an interesting challenge for me. I know nothing about either topic but will make an attempt anyway after some research. I will look for mind stimulating ideas and possibly write a fictional piece. This is good for sharpening my writing skills. Join me for updates on this exciting writer's webservice.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Writing When You Have Nothing to Say

Every writer struggles occasionally with writer's block. I wish I could say I never did but that would turn into the greatest fiction I ever wrote.
I have discovered a few tricks to barging past the mental barracade.
1. When I have nothing of importance to say, I sit back and observe my environment. I pick an unusual object and try to describe it in detail and then I imagine an unusual use of the object. This has resulted in some pretty silly poetry or prose but nonetheless ignites creative flow.
2. I stop doing everything and listen to classical music. This often brings about a short power nap. Usually, I awaken with a fresh idea.
3. I search for ideas from photographs or clippings from newspapers and magazines. I try to think of unusual angles to take based on topics I see.
There are probably many more ways to cure writer's block. What do you do to stimulate creative flow when the well runs dry?